(Note: This information has come from years of reading on relationships,trials and errors from dating hundreds of women,(Being self-employed brought on a lot of hands on experience.) attending workshops and some biblical principles as well. From my training and experience these are my thoughts.) If you want true happiness in your life, one of the most important things to do is to find the right mate for you. Yes its a long process and may take many years for you to find but the rewards for the most part are truly fulfilling. I believe the first thing is to recognize that YOU are an imperfect human who needs growth within. We are are our own worst enemies so as we work on striving to be a better person, this will make us a better catch for our mate. So here is the top thing we need to learn about ourselves.
1.We are humans and we make mistakes so we must confess our mistakes. Pride has no place in relationships although it plays a BIG part in many disputes between couples. Sometimes when our mate's correct we have to walk away with our pride not wanting to give in to error. But to come back and say "I apologize, you were right" strengthens the bond between the two of you.
2. Bad habits can be corrected over time. To say "That's the way I am" will not be effective in a healthy relationship if you don't try to get away from it in time. This is particular for the narcissist who demands to have it their way or no way. (Big Baby Syndrome.)
3.Do you know how to Love? Sad to say that many people today don't really know what love is. Love is an action word. If you love someone you will show them in how you treat them. Some people will love you "IF" you do this or that for them. This is conditional love and love isn't conditional! It's sad to say but most people who are given the gift of good looks fall in to this category. (But not all.) If someone is loving me based solely on what I do for them, this isn't true love. Yes in relationship you need security, (Financial and Commitment among others.) however something will be missing if your with him or her solely for this purpose. Love requires trust, forgiveness (And NEVER bringing the issue back up once forgiven. A VERY HARD thing to do. I think we all fall short on this one.) encouraging, patience, slow to anger and quick to forgive. Being a God fearing man, he forgives us and he REQUIRES us to forgive he won't forgive us (Matt 6:15) Those are some of the the most important qualities of love.
4.To yourself be true. Know who you are and ask people about your personality traits good and bad that you are not aware of. Write them down and look at your positives and negatives.
5. Get to know the person BEFORE you have a physical relationship. Having sex before you get to know someone can truly damage your relationship from the start. You can become physically attracted to a personality that's contradicts your standards of what you require in a relationship. Emotions and our ego are powerful and real. They with override logic if you catch feeling and your partner doesn't. The one who doesn't catch those same feeling dominates the relationship. For some reason, its usually the one who attracts the opposite sex the most that rules.
1.We are humans and we make mistakes so we must confess our mistakes. Pride has no place in relationships although it plays a BIG part in many disputes between couples. Sometimes when our mate's correct we have to walk away with our pride not wanting to give in to error. But to come back and say "I apologize, you were right" strengthens the bond between the two of you.
2. Bad habits can be corrected over time. To say "That's the way I am" will not be effective in a healthy relationship if you don't try to get away from it in time. This is particular for the narcissist who demands to have it their way or no way. (Big Baby Syndrome.)
3.Do you know how to Love? Sad to say that many people today don't really know what love is. Love is an action word. If you love someone you will show them in how you treat them. Some people will love you "IF" you do this or that for them. This is conditional love and love isn't conditional! It's sad to say but most people who are given the gift of good looks fall in to this category. (But not all.) If someone is loving me based solely on what I do for them, this isn't true love. Yes in relationship you need security, (Financial and Commitment among others.) however something will be missing if your with him or her solely for this purpose. Love requires trust, forgiveness (And NEVER bringing the issue back up once forgiven. A VERY HARD thing to do. I think we all fall short on this one.) encouraging, patience, slow to anger and quick to forgive. Being a God fearing man, he forgives us and he REQUIRES us to forgive he won't forgive us (Matt 6:15) Those are some of the the most important qualities of love.
4.To yourself be true. Know who you are and ask people about your personality traits good and bad that you are not aware of. Write them down and look at your positives and negatives.
5. Get to know the person BEFORE you have a physical relationship. Having sex before you get to know someone can truly damage your relationship from the start. You can become physically attracted to a personality that's contradicts your standards of what you require in a relationship. Emotions and our ego are powerful and real. They with override logic if you catch feeling and your partner doesn't. The one who doesn't catch those same feeling dominates the relationship. For some reason, its usually the one who attracts the opposite sex the most that rules.